Discussion about this post

User's avatar
Jolene's avatar

As a parent whose child came to believe he was trans after being immersed in toxic online forums on Reddit and Discord, I was appalled by the evidence of grooming I saw immediately . I was dismissed, shamed, silenced, and threatened with the myth of suicide by both of my two children, therapists, coworkers, and teachers at a school I had dedicated 14 years of volunteer time to. This has taken a toll on my marriage, caused me to resign from my job, destroyed my trust in institutions, caused me to question my own sanity, political views, definition of faith and family. My lowest day was the day my employer celebrated the success of her son’s ( 21 years old) orchiectomy in a work group chat. I was terrified this was the path my son (then 15) had put himself on before he had ever engaged in intimacy, or experienced real loving affection for another human being. That day, I looked for a rafter in my basement to hang myself from because of the hopelessness I felt. It took sheer will to face each day. There seemed to be nowhere to turn. This darkness is like nothing I’ve ever faced. It has taken 4.5 years to rebuild my self esteem, my parental agency, and to get control of the fear that gripped my heart like a vice. Living in that state 24/7 is unbearable. This is what this ideology does to mothers and fathers and families. Today I give thanks to the underground parent networks of people like me... those who knew there was no way three kids on my own street could suddenly be trans. What I just don’t understand is how anyone sees this as possible that you can become your self by denying yourself. As a product of the “free to be you and me” generation, I am still jaw droppingly stunned by this entire idea! This movement is based on affirming self hatred! We must expose the link to online activism and grooming to the declaration of ROGD. Our kids are the victims of a culture where there are too few Jamie Reeds! With voices like yours, I grow in hope and faith in humanity once more! TY!

Expand full comment
Linoak's avatar

I have my own clinic horror story. Clinicians voicing “support” to my 15yo child in his desire to transition despite my refusal to consent. But that’s not the story here. The story here is you. It’s not heroic to do what’s easy, what comes naturally. It’s heroic to find your way out — let the gnawing discomfort find its way to the surface and, despite the negative consequences, do what you know to be right. The past harm and regret doesn’t change that. It makes it all the more remarkable that you spoke out instead of just going along or getting out and fading into the background. You are a hero, Jamie. We need a million more of you. I hope you’ve given others the courage to help end this tragedy.

Expand full comment
15 more comments...

No posts